Merry Christmas!

It is that time of year! I love Christmas...the lights, the feel, seeing family, everything. Well, everything except for all the crazy shoppers and the fact that they start Christmas on Halloween. But, anyway, I just wanted to wish everyone a Merry Christmas! It is odd to think that next Christmas I might have a child to explore the joys of Christmas with. But, for this year, I enjoyed it with my four-legged kids. We made salt-dough Christmas ornaments this weekend!

Many people get an ornament each year that signifies something special from that time. So, my ornament, a heart made out of my fingerprints, signifies the fact that I was just fingerprinted for the sake of offering love and a safe home to a child in the new year. (Please ignore the fact that it looks pink - it really is red. Plus, the paint was still wet. All the ornaments actually look a lot better now that they have dried!)

Charlie was the best at doing his print, but I kind of messed it up after that. Here's Charlie's:

And, even though Freckles wasn't a big fan of this project, his turned out awesome! Go Freckles!

Hope you and your family, whether 2 legged or 4, have a very

Merry Christmas!



THE Foster Parenting Podcast

I’ve been intending on writing this blog since this summer. Obviously I never got around to it until now. I just wanted to share with you a little about a podcast I had found. It is, of course, about foster care and is something I would recommend to anyone interested in the foster care or fost-to-adopt process. It is hosted by T & W, a young Christian couple who live in California. They shared their story in such a very real, raw way that you couldn't help fall in love with them and their family. I think the fact that you could hear their voice and the emotion helps allow you to really connect with them. Sometimes there was tears, but there was also a whole lot of laughter.

T&W fostered for a while before eventually adopting sibling girls. The podcast mostly covers their journey of bringing the girls into their home, first as foster kids, and then all the way through to the finalization of their adoptions. (I guess I just ruined the end of their story for you, didn't I?! ha!) They did foster other children while having their girls, and so share stories from those & their previous fostering experiences as well.

I found this podcast in of all places, Pinterest! And, when I did come upon them they had already been posting for a couple of years and had recorded over 100 episodes. I chose to listen to 2 or 3 episodes that looked interesting (each is titled & has a summary) before deciding that I’d just start from the beginning. It took me just under two weeks to listen to what took them years to record. I actually felt a little guilty – as if I did their journey an injustice by traveling it’s entire course it just a couple of weeks. But, I realized that was kind of the point. They created it to share their journey with friends and family but also inspire and help those interested in starting their own journey. When they were going through the process they searched for a resource such as this without any luck. So, they created this podcast as a way to fill that need for other people.

Considering each episode was around 30 minutes, they have shared over 50 hours of what they have learned about foster care and adoption from their own personal experiences. They shared about seemingly everything. They shared tips about fostering agencies, bio family visitations, what it is like in the court room, how to get the appropriate help for your child at school (many Foster kids are behind in school), books & other resources, trials foster/adoptive children face, and just all the things that can happen in the crazy, everyday life of fostering. I learned SO much about the system and how it works (at least in California...every state differs in their rules & regulations).

So much information in fact that shortly after beginning to listen to their podcast I realized the need to actually take notes while doing so. I ended up with quite a long list of things to take away from what they had to share. A list of books to read (some of which I've already read now), ideas on how to parent or deal with certain foster-specific situations, quotes (that I don't think maybe they intended to be "quotes"), tips on making the child feel a part of the family, privacy, the loss felt when a foster child moves on, etc. SO, so, so much stuff I can't list it all here!

They also were just great inspiration and encouragement. They always had such faith in God no matter what happened during their journey. And, they managed to approach almost every situation with a bit of humor....at least later! They also let me off the hook for feeling guilty about not being able to provide certain things and what a strength it is to truly understand my limitations. I'm so glad I took notes, but also feel like listening to it all again could be beneficial...as I didn't take notes at the beginning.

They no longer record new podcasts regularly, as they have settled into life with their girls and no longer foster. Though, that may change as I think they suggested in their last post that they are considering fostering again. Either way, this foster parenting podcast is awesome and an amazing learning tool for anyone considering foster care/adoption. Or, just for anyone who knows someone (that means you!) who is fostering and would like to learn more about it.

You can find them at:

 The Foster Parenting Podcast 

or 

Foster Parenting Podcast on Facebook



Fingerprints

The next step is in the books...I was fingerprinted! They do it by live scan (no ink!) and send it straight to the FBI. Now I just mail my paperwork back to my agency so they can do what they need to do for my background check.

Here are a couple of shots for the memory book...

Live action of the live scan printing! (sorry its blurry...)

The live scan machine &... all done!

Step by Step

Making progress is good. And to me, being able to put real dates on the calendar is good progress in this journey. I spoke with my licensing agent this week and got some more details on being fingerprinted and my upcoming training. I now have exact dates of when this will be happening!

I will go to be fingerprinted on Monday. There are many dates and locations available for fingerprinting, but Monday’s times allow me to miss the least amount of work. So, Monday it is! I will just take my paperwork given to me by the agency and drop by and get printed. There will be no fee to me, as my agency pays for this process.

Now, training is a little further away than expected. During my in-home orientation she told me training would begin in January. This is true, but only of the week-night classes. As I have decided to do the Saturday classes, I have to wait until February. Both the week-night and Saturday sessions will end during the same week, they just start at different times. My first training class will be on Saturday, February 9th and will continue each Saturday through March 9^th.  

After March 9^th, assuming my background check and Home Study have been completed (which it should be), I will officially be licensed and open for placements. So, for those who keep asking, “When will you get a kid?” My best answer is sometime after March 9^th! So, yes, I could have a child placed with me as early as March. But giving an exact time is impossible as there are a variety of factors that play into placing a child.

The other big thing on my mind lately is that of child care. I have found resources to use, such as the YMCA after-school program, but I would really like to be able to offer my child a more one-on-one setting - at least part of the time. Please pray that someone will volunteer or that I will seek & find the right person for this job. In foster care you can't just hire anyone or drop off your child randomly at some one's house who is willing to care for them. Any individual that will care for the child must pass a background check first. They must be approved by the agency to care for the child. So, as you can imagine, that complicates things slightly.

Please pray that I find someone who:

1. Has experience with kids, and can understand the 'special needs' that may accompany a foster child.
2. Available from 3-6pm, M-F (or at least a few days) and maybe an hour in the morning (it all depends on the school schedules).
3. Willing to submit to and pass a background check.
4. Just an overall good match for me, my home, child, and pets.

 Thanks for all your prayers! Be on the look-out for another blog post soon. I have one I started to write, but never finished. Hopefully I can finally catch up on that one!

Crossing the Starting Line

I finally did it! I have officially crossed the starting line of this journey I've been rambling on and on about for months now.

Last Tuesday I had my in-home orientation. Leading up to this in-home meeting I was a bit stressed. But, it seemed to be a controlled stress. There was just too much to try to accomplish before that day to be overcome by the stress. Not knowing what exactly would happen during the meeting, or what they would be looking at, it was a bit difficult. But, in the end I decided not to stress the little stuff and just let God take care of everything.

Tuesday came and I worked half a day before heading home to walk Freckles and do one last run through the house. My licensing worker arrived and Freckles did NOT bark at her, something I had been praying about all morning! Go Freckles! However, he did huff & puff while watching us during our meeting. That was my bad, I realized later. I had put myself in a corner with the licensing worker on the outside. Freckles couldn't get to me and maybe thought she was a threat. As soon as I removed myself from the corner, he was fine and did good otherwise.

So, the meeting: we reviewed every form in my application packet. She just made sure everything was signed and filled out properly. She explained different things to make sure I understood what I was signing and answered any questions I had about the forms. As I mentioned in a previous post, I had a lot of questions about the Behaviors form. She was very helpful and explained every one that I had any question on. It made a big difference and allowed me to more confidently check the appropriate boxes. After fully reviewing the application packet and explaining some things to me, I was able to ask her questions (that weren't directly related to the application.) I had some I needed answers to and also got tips on questions to ask from other single foster parents I have connected with on Facebook. I ended up with about 14 on the official list. She was great about answering them all though. Between the application, discussion, and my questions, we sat and talked for almost an hour. I was thankful to have someone who seemed kind and wasn't annoyed by my endless questions.

She seemed impressed that I had not only typed up my questions and had them ready, but that I had made an excel spreadsheet to track my application packet. But let me tell you, if I hadn't made that spreadsheet, there is no way in the world that I could have kept track of all that stuff it in my head! I did it out of necessity, not just for fun or to impress anyone. But, towards the end of the meeting she did say that it seemed I was organized and had everything in order and that certain things/situations would go well for me because of that.

The final part of the meeting was a walk-through tour of the house. She just checked out each room and looked out the windows at the backyard. (That's good because my back patio, up against the house, is a disaster of leaves and other yard stuff that I never cleaned up!) We checked every smoke & Co2 detector - which Freckles "loved" - and then that was about it. She reminded me of the next steps and then was on her way.

So what are the next steps? Here is where I'm at...

1. Fingerprints & Background Check: This week she is supposed to give me the information on where to get fingerprinted. Once I do that my background check will begin to process. Apparently they are experiencing long wait times for their checks, but there are a few more steps to get through before that really starts to matter.
2. Training: Due to the holidays, all training is completed for this year. So, I will start training in January. I will have my choice of two different programs. One is a 9 wk course which includes one night a week for 9 consecutive weeks. The other is a 5 1/2 week course done on Saturdays. Both include the same information and same amount of training hours (27), so it is just a personal preference. For me, Saturdays are really going to work best, so that is the plan I'm going to request.
3. Home Study: Once the background check is completed & approved, they can do the Home Study. They sometimes do it before training is done, but its different with each person. For those who don't know, the Home Study will involve more in-depth discussion on me, personally. Things such as how I was parented, how I plan/hope to parent, etc. I'm not sure of everything it involves, but I do know it is a pretty big deal.

Once those three steps have been completed, then they can find a placement for me. So, looking at the training schedule, it seems that I could have a placement as early as February or March. There is lots to do before then, but I'm sure that time is going to fly by so fast!

Thanks for all of your prayers and support that have helped me to make it this far! Be sure to keep an eye out for more posts and updates soon!

 (Sorry for the delayed update - I was out of town on vacation for Thanksgiving!)

One Week...

One week from today an agency worker will be sitting in my home, and this journey will officially be under way. I’m excited, nervous, stressed, happy, and fearful. It seems that I am on the verge of one of the most difficult and most rewarding times of my life. There is so much yet to do and learn.

In this final week I’m just trying to stay calm, get as much done as possible, and trust that God will take care of the rest. Last night God answered one of my biggest prayers of the last 2 weeks. I realized that I had to put onto paper two emergency care givers. These people step in and care for the child for the first 24hrs, should I fall seriously ill, need to go to the ER, or have some other kind of emergency. From my understanding, they needed to be local and live on the IL side of the river. Now, I have few friends in this area, and even fewer on the IL side. My initial thoughts on who could fulfill this role did not work out. Thankfully, though, I had met some great people at church in recent months. Once I started praying about this, one person became clear pretty quickly. I asked and they agreed. The 2^nd spot was a bit harder to nail down. I thought and prayed about it a lot and decided to ask another woman I met at church. Last night I got the word that she, too, would be willing (and even honored) to fill this need. I was so excited! I had been really nervous about this, but God has slowly, but surely been helping me to make connections, build relationships, and create the circle of support I so desperately need and have been praying for over the past few months. I will continue to pray on this subject, though, as there can never be enough good, supportive people in your life….especially when you are entering the world of foster care.

For this next week, these are the things I'm praying for, and asking you to pray for as well!

1. For health and strength for me to accomplish all on my "to-do" list before the 20th.
2. To see what is important and what isn’t…don’t stress over little things that don’t need to be stressed over!
3. That I correctly filled out my application packet and won't have to redo any of it.
4. That the agency worker will be kind, helpful, and find me worth moving forward in the process.
5. That I know all of the right questions to ask, as well as hear & understand all of the important information.
6. Wisdom to know what to do with all of the answers & information I receive that day, so that I know the best path for me moving forward.
7. For Freckles & Charlie to be on their best behavior that day!

I appreciate all of your thoughts and prayers! Please remember me on November 20th!



Jump Start

Every now and again in life our battery gets low and we need a bit of a jump start. Well, that has been me lately. Following surgery it has seemed that EVERYTHING has been running on low....energy, finances, motivation, vacation time, etc. This left me in a bit of a rut and feeling discouraged about my journey towards foster care. It just seemed so far away. I have been telling myself for a week or so now that I have to pull myself together and get refocused and motivated. Today, I got just the jump start I needed to propel me forward.

My agency called and wanted to follow-up on my request to become a foster parent. I explained that I hadn't contacted her again due to my surgery, and that it has just taken me longer to recover than I anticipated. I also told her I was thankful she called. It was just the motivation I needed. She wanted to go ahead and put an appointment on the calendar to do my in-home orientation, and, well, we did! So, on Tuesday, November 20th I will have my in-home meeting with her. We will review my full application & the process. We will discuss any questions and do a review of my home. I am both excited and nervous!!! There is SO much to do in the next couple weeks to get ready!

I would appreciate ALL prayers you can offer! I am going to need focus, strength, health, and energy to accomplish this part of the process before the 20th! Also, if you live in the St. Louis area and would be willing to come help do a bit of cleaning or yard work on Saturday, the 17th, please contact me! I would LOVE to have help to finish off everything and help me make sure I didn't miss anything.

Whew, I can't believe a date it set to officially cross the 'start line' of this journey. I'm excited, nervous, and just prayerful that everything turns out well.