Home Study

I apologize for not getting this update out sooner. I started to write it, but just never finished it.

OK, so, first of all I'd like to thank all of you for your prayers and well-wishes for my Home Study this past Saturday. From what I could gather, it appeared to have gone alright. Here is what happened on Saturday...

  

My licensing agent arrived and Freckles barked! The End!

 

 

Ha! This woman was nice, but she loves dogs. (Freckles tends to only quickly become friends with those who don't.) I immediately informed her, as I do all of my guests, that if she just ignored him all would be well. I knew I was going to have an issue when she responded by trying to convince Freckles that she loves dogs, that she is a nice person, etc. After a few minutes she did back off, but, since she started off on the wrong foot with him, he was huffy & barky most of the time we were talking. I was even fully accessible to him this time- with her in the corner. He just wouldn't come near her. I also gave him a bone after a while - which only slightly helped. He finally settled down about 30-45 min after she arrived. I was bummed, but she kept saying it was OK.

  

So anyway, the meeting was much shorter than anticipated. I had done research on Home Studies & found a variety of questions that are often asked as I wanted to be able to think them through a bit before having to provide an official answer. I ended up being over-prepared. However, I'm sure it was of benefit to think through all of the other questions as well.

Here is just some of what we discussed:

- Were you raised in a two-parent home & are they still living?

- What type of relationship do you have with your family?

- How did your parents discipline you?
- Did your parents provide for all of your emotional & physical needs?
- Did you ever have any interaction with DCFS a growing up?
- How would you describe your personality?
- Why do you want to foster/adopt?
- Where did you go to college & what did you study?
- Where do you work & what is your job title?
- What, if any, religious affiliation do you have? What is your level of involvement (regular attender/other activities)?

We also discussed information about the age range, sex, and other information about the children I would be interested in fostering. She shared more information with me about fostering, the process, different meetings, procedures,  and other tips.

After we discussed everything, she did another walk-through of the home and then headed out. I felt that it went well and that she seemed happy with the answers I provided. At least, she didn't point out any issues during the conversation or walk-through. And, I'm guessing that at this stage, if she noticed an issue, she would be telling me about it.

The biggest thing that makes me feel a bit more confident in the idea of me passing all the steps to the process and receiving my license lies in a brief conversation partway through my Licensing Worker's visit.

Towards the end of the interview, it went like this:

LW: "Well, as soon as we finish here, I will take this back, put it in the computer, and then you should recieve your license in about two weeks."

Me: (slightly dumfounded) "Before I finish my training?"

LW: "You haven't finished training yet?! I thought you already finished..."

Me: "No, I haven't even begun training. I start next week."

LW: "Oh yeah! I remember now. Your clearances were finished, maybe that's what I was thinking."

Considering I haven't even started training and she is already trying to give me my license...I'll take that as a good sign. Also, as she was leaving my home, she mentioned how, after training, then the license would be issued. I'm not sure if she was referring to me specifically or the standard process (once all the steps are complete and your clearances have passed then you recieve your license). But, as I said, I think it went well, I haven't been told of anything I need to work on or change, and the things in which we were discussing about the kids makes me feel that I will, in fact, be receiving my license once I have completed training.
So, that's it for now. The Home Study went well and training starts next Saturday! Training will make for a long week, running from 9:30am-4:30pm, but I'm thankful for the Saturday option! That will happen for the next few weeks and then, it appears, the real adventure will begin!

I'm Cleared!

It seems life has gone crazy lately...and I haven't even begun fostering yet! It all started about a week and a half ago. Since most of you already know the craziness that has been unfolding, I will not retell it all here.
I just want to thank all those who have been praying and ask for your continued prayers in those situations.

What I want to share, though, is this: in the midst of all that craziness I received a call from my new licensing worker. She informed me that my clearances (background check, etc) have passed and she was ready to schedule my Home Study! She spoke at a rate of a million miles per minute, but she seemed nice. By the end our phone call we had scheduled my Home Study for this Saturday, the 2nd.

I'm still not a 100% sure what to expect from this part of the process, but I pray that me, my home, and my pets all pass the test. I've lost all good time to prepare my house as I went home to be with family a week ago, was sick this entire past weekend, and well...now it is only a couple of days away. I would be panicking, but I just don't have the time or energy to do so. I'm going to have to clean what I can clean and leave the rest up to God!

I will be sure to update you after my Home Study on Saturday to let you know how it went. Until then, here are three directions where you can send your good thoughts and prayers:

1. Home Study: Although I don't really have time to panic, I'm still nervous. This is a huge part of the process of me becoming licensed. Pray that my licensing worker comes with a good dose of grace and that I can just be myself - not trying too hard to say or do the right thing. If this is indeed the path I'm supposed to be on, I trust God will take care of the details and it will all end up alright.
2. Child Care: I've mentioned the after-school program I'm hoping to use, but am still looking for other options for various situations. I've just begun researching individual child care providers a little over a week ago and seem to be lost in the process. Just not sure how to really find the best fit. Praying that I will receive some personal recommendation from those I know in the area and that I find the right person/people in time!
3. Me: Just that I can stay healthy, focused, and passionate.

Thanks!

A New Year's Update

Hello! Did everyone survive the holidays? Hope so! I started to type this blog last week, saying it was my first full week back to work, etc. Then, I got a kidney stone! Actually, I'm calling it a kidney "pebble." I've had a kidney stone before and this felt nothing like death at the end of the world! So, I'm still trying to catch up on life from the holidays, overtime at work, and being a bit ill. Sorry it has taken so long, I know many of you have been asking how things are going. Here is what has been happening.

The holidays were great, but fast this year. I wished you all a Merry Christmas before, so now I guess its time for a, albeit belated, Happy New Year! And what a NEW year it will be! New obviously being the key word here. It seems that everything will become new this year. A whole new life and way of doing things. Lots of firsts, changes, challenges, and hopefully joys as well. Come the end of March and I should be licensed to receive Foster Care placements. I’ll have a new routine, with new people, new responsibilities, new struggles, new fears, new joys, new fun, and new ways of doing just about everything.

I've had many people ask me, “So, are you excited, or nervous, or what?” My answer was “Yes!” I’m all of the above! I’m excited and scared to death at the same time. I know it will be hard. And not just the parenting part. There are so many rules and regulations to follow and someone always there looking over your shoulder to make sure you aren't screwing it up. On one hand that is scary and makes me uncomfortable in that I can't just parent and make the decisions that I feel are best. On the other hand, it might be good to have those guides and helps in my first attempt at parenting. I don't know. Hopefully it will be as painless as possible. But, back to the question. Yes, I am excited! Yes, I am nervous! Pretty much every emotion you can think of has come at some point. I just have to keep focused on why I'm doing this and trust that God will work out the details.

Another question I've gotten is, "So, where are you in the process?" Well, I'm in a waiting period right now. My application packet has been turned it, my initial meeting survived, fingerprints taken, and background check begun. Now, I sit and wait for training to begin. Had I done the mid-week training schedule, I would already be in training. I chose, however, to do the Saturday schedule and that will begin on February 9th. So, right now there isn't much for me to do...except pray. I've been doing a lot of that. I feel like God may be tiring of my "to-do" list, but I'm really going to need him to make this all workout.

So, that leads to the final topic - how you can pray. Here are things on my mind lately that might help you if you are praying for me.

1. Child Care! This is huge. Being a single-parent I'm going to need a lot of help! I've talked to a friend who has experience with the after-school program I was considering & says it is a great one. However, there are still a lot of other instances I will need child care. Please pray that I can find the right people to help fill this need.
2. Changes in Licensing Worker. I'm not sure the reasons why or what it means for me, but I have been assigned a new Licensing Worker. Please pray that she is kind, full of grace, and will be a great support to me during this part of the process.
3. "My" Child. I was considering a few days back how many people adopting wait for their child to be born. Me, I'm waiting for a child who already exists. And that child, if not in the system yet (or even if they are), may be in a really bad situation. It breaks my heart to imagine what they may be dealing with right now. I pray strength, hope, escape, and healing for them.
4. Me. Yeah, I've had a lot of up and down emotions lately about this and I just need to really get refocused and on-top of everything. The down time has had me mentally slacking off a bit on what still needs to be done before I get busy again with training, licensing, etc.
5. Home Study. This is to take place after my background check is complete, probably before I finish training. Its an in-depth interview and will make a big impact on how things move forward. Pray that I am able to just be me and that that is enough.

Ok, I think that is enough of an update for now. If you have any questions you are always welcomed to email me or message me on Facebook!

Merry Christmas!

It is that time of year! I love Christmas...the lights, the feel, seeing family, everything. Well, everything except for all the crazy shoppers and the fact that they start Christmas on Halloween. But, anyway, I just wanted to wish everyone a Merry Christmas! It is odd to think that next Christmas I might have a child to explore the joys of Christmas with. But, for this year, I enjoyed it with my four-legged kids. We made salt-dough Christmas ornaments this weekend!

Many people get an ornament each year that signifies something special from that time. So, my ornament, a heart made out of my fingerprints, signifies the fact that I was just fingerprinted for the sake of offering love and a safe home to a child in the new year. (Please ignore the fact that it looks pink - it really is red. Plus, the paint was still wet. All the ornaments actually look a lot better now that they have dried!)

Charlie was the best at doing his print, but I kind of messed it up after that. Here's Charlie's:

And, even though Freckles wasn't a big fan of this project, his turned out awesome! Go Freckles!

Hope you and your family, whether 2 legged or 4, have a very

Merry Christmas!



THE Foster Parenting Podcast

I’ve been intending on writing this blog since this summer. Obviously I never got around to it until now. I just wanted to share with you a little about a podcast I had found. It is, of course, about foster care and is something I would recommend to anyone interested in the foster care or fost-to-adopt process. It is hosted by T & W, a young Christian couple who live in California. They shared their story in such a very real, raw way that you couldn't help fall in love with them and their family. I think the fact that you could hear their voice and the emotion helps allow you to really connect with them. Sometimes there was tears, but there was also a whole lot of laughter.

T&W fostered for a while before eventually adopting sibling girls. The podcast mostly covers their journey of bringing the girls into their home, first as foster kids, and then all the way through to the finalization of their adoptions. (I guess I just ruined the end of their story for you, didn't I?! ha!) They did foster other children while having their girls, and so share stories from those & their previous fostering experiences as well.

I found this podcast in of all places, Pinterest! And, when I did come upon them they had already been posting for a couple of years and had recorded over 100 episodes. I chose to listen to 2 or 3 episodes that looked interesting (each is titled & has a summary) before deciding that I’d just start from the beginning. It took me just under two weeks to listen to what took them years to record. I actually felt a little guilty – as if I did their journey an injustice by traveling it’s entire course it just a couple of weeks. But, I realized that was kind of the point. They created it to share their journey with friends and family but also inspire and help those interested in starting their own journey. When they were going through the process they searched for a resource such as this without any luck. So, they created this podcast as a way to fill that need for other people.

Considering each episode was around 30 minutes, they have shared over 50 hours of what they have learned about foster care and adoption from their own personal experiences. They shared about seemingly everything. They shared tips about fostering agencies, bio family visitations, what it is like in the court room, how to get the appropriate help for your child at school (many Foster kids are behind in school), books & other resources, trials foster/adoptive children face, and just all the things that can happen in the crazy, everyday life of fostering. I learned SO much about the system and how it works (at least in California...every state differs in their rules & regulations).

So much information in fact that shortly after beginning to listen to their podcast I realized the need to actually take notes while doing so. I ended up with quite a long list of things to take away from what they had to share. A list of books to read (some of which I've already read now), ideas on how to parent or deal with certain foster-specific situations, quotes (that I don't think maybe they intended to be "quotes"), tips on making the child feel a part of the family, privacy, the loss felt when a foster child moves on, etc. SO, so, so much stuff I can't list it all here!

They also were just great inspiration and encouragement. They always had such faith in God no matter what happened during their journey. And, they managed to approach almost every situation with a bit of humor....at least later! They also let me off the hook for feeling guilty about not being able to provide certain things and what a strength it is to truly understand my limitations. I'm so glad I took notes, but also feel like listening to it all again could be beneficial...as I didn't take notes at the beginning.

They no longer record new podcasts regularly, as they have settled into life with their girls and no longer foster. Though, that may change as I think they suggested in their last post that they are considering fostering again. Either way, this foster parenting podcast is awesome and an amazing learning tool for anyone considering foster care/adoption. Or, just for anyone who knows someone (that means you!) who is fostering and would like to learn more about it.

You can find them at:

 The Foster Parenting Podcast 

or 

Foster Parenting Podcast on Facebook



Fingerprints

The next step is in the books...I was fingerprinted! They do it by live scan (no ink!) and send it straight to the FBI. Now I just mail my paperwork back to my agency so they can do what they need to do for my background check.

Here are a couple of shots for the memory book...

Live action of the live scan printing! (sorry its blurry...)

The live scan machine &... all done!

Step by Step

Making progress is good. And to me, being able to put real dates on the calendar is good progress in this journey. I spoke with my licensing agent this week and got some more details on being fingerprinted and my upcoming training. I now have exact dates of when this will be happening!

I will go to be fingerprinted on Monday. There are many dates and locations available for fingerprinting, but Monday’s times allow me to miss the least amount of work. So, Monday it is! I will just take my paperwork given to me by the agency and drop by and get printed. There will be no fee to me, as my agency pays for this process.

Now, training is a little further away than expected. During my in-home orientation she told me training would begin in January. This is true, but only of the week-night classes. As I have decided to do the Saturday classes, I have to wait until February. Both the week-night and Saturday sessions will end during the same week, they just start at different times. My first training class will be on Saturday, February 9th and will continue each Saturday through March 9^th.  

After March 9^th, assuming my background check and Home Study have been completed (which it should be), I will officially be licensed and open for placements. So, for those who keep asking, “When will you get a kid?” My best answer is sometime after March 9^th! So, yes, I could have a child placed with me as early as March. But giving an exact time is impossible as there are a variety of factors that play into placing a child.

The other big thing on my mind lately is that of child care. I have found resources to use, such as the YMCA after-school program, but I would really like to be able to offer my child a more one-on-one setting - at least part of the time. Please pray that someone will volunteer or that I will seek & find the right person for this job. In foster care you can't just hire anyone or drop off your child randomly at some one's house who is willing to care for them. Any individual that will care for the child must pass a background check first. They must be approved by the agency to care for the child. So, as you can imagine, that complicates things slightly.

Please pray that I find someone who:

1. Has experience with kids, and can understand the 'special needs' that may accompany a foster child.
2. Available from 3-6pm, M-F (or at least a few days) and maybe an hour in the morning (it all depends on the school schedules).
3. Willing to submit to and pass a background check.
4. Just an overall good match for me, my home, child, and pets.

 Thanks for all your prayers! Be on the look-out for another blog post soon. I have one I started to write, but never finished. Hopefully I can finally catch up on that one!